Lola Honey's Death anniversary

got a sms from my mom last night. she asked me if i can go with her to my lola's grave. i thought at first she just wanted to visit my lola, but what came as a shock was, today is her death anniversary.
i didn't realize it has been a year since my lola passed away. again, sadeness washed over me and all the memories i had with her came back.

i even remembered the dream i had of her 2 days after she passed away. she was playfully scolding me for being such a crybaby. (that night i had the dream i was crying my eyes out in front of her casket) she was telling me she's happy now and in my dream she was with my lolo. although lolo goding was just there standing looking at me. can't remember if his look was curious or proud in seeing his first grandchild again after 25 years.

so after that dream, i stopped, cold turkey in being a crybaby. i don't know if it's a good thing or not. but the bottom line is, at least lola's happy now.

and for sure tonight i might get a dream visit from her again. i really miss her. and of course her cooking.

can't wait to talk to her in my dream and tell her she's going to have another grandchild on the way. finally from my uncle who has been trying to have one after they got married.

but still, i'm still happy-sad today. happy that i have another guardian angel watching over me and the kids and sad because lola honey isn't here physically.

* i called my lolas (maternal and paternal) names not based on their names or nicknames. but my own pet names for them: hence, lola darling and lola honey.

if you could say a little prayer for lola honey, that would be great. i'm sure she'd love that. include lola darling na rin. =)