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since the end of july, hubby and i have been struggling with taking care of the boys. our two yayas have left for the province for personal reasons. yaya jackie, had to leave even if she didn't want to. if she ha a choice she would stay with us, but then, she has a family of her own and her hubby had to go back to work after being ill for a month or so. now, she had to go home and be there for her own kids.
as much as i would not let her go, i understand her. being a mom and all, she has to raise her own family.
yaya donna on the other hand, being young and all at 19 years, had to go home to her ailing mother. again, family duties.
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i would be a hypocrite to say that we rely a lo on household help. it's no joke taking care and looking after 3 rowdy boys. and our family needs all the extra hands we can get.
the past few weeks have been a slow uphill climb. but we managed to survive, with the help of my mom, who, as much as i would want her to rest and enjoy her retirement, had to be on second mommy duty. even if she sometimes complain of being tired as i am, deep inside i can see her enjoying the moment being grandma (mama) to her grandkids. same goes for my dad as well.
admittedly, i miss having those little stolen moments of an hour or so with hubby before we hed home. but sacrifices had to be made. on the other side, the kids are enjoying more time with us. we get to see them awake, tuck them in at night, see them off to school-and even be with them in school.
work may take a back seat for now, since family has to come first. but then, it doesn't mean that i forget about deadlines and other work related things. i just need to do a little adjustment. meetings, deadlines etc.
i tweeted a few days ago that looking for a good yaya is indeed hard. it's not about the workload but the amount of trust you can give a person to take care of your child. i don't go on relying on agencies alone. i have trust issues with those types. i would prefer referrals from friends, those who have first or second hand source into the type of person who's going to take care of my kids 70% of the time.
so at night, i pray that before the month ends, we get to find 2 yaya's that would be a keeper for us.
i hope so, i sure hope so...
Showing posts with label mommy tales. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mommy tales. Show all posts
Monday, August 9, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Motherhood
my first contribution to Kerol and her sister's blog. i was asked to write for them, share some insights about being a woman, a wife, a friend and everything in between.
i also consider myself as a non domestic diva.
click on the title to go to their site
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I wasn’t prepared for motherhood.
When P and I were still dating, both at a very young age of 23, both climbing the corporate ladder and establishing our careers in sales, P for an FMCG, while I was working for an local online portal in sales. The thought of being parents never crossed our minds. We were enjoying the moment of going out on impromptu road trips, dates after work, getting pissed drunk and not worrying about it the next day. That time, we were living the “perfect” life.
I never imagined myself being a mom. I had this idea that I would marry when I turn 30, with a well compensated job and maybe 1 kid. But then fate took a different course (not that I’m blaming fate), in 2004, I found out I was pregnant. The moment I saw those to pink lines I didn’t know what to do. I could not fathom the idea that at the age of 23, I was going to be a mom. I was still childish. I didn’t have a 5 year plan, long term goals and all that adult stuff. I lived in the moment.
How could I be a mom this young? I didn’t have any domestic skills at all. I can’t even cook a decent meal, I hated the thought of washing and ironing clothes, cleaning the house was literally a chore. What more, taking care of an infant? It took me the whole pregnancy to deal with these issues. I was scared, worried. Sure, I had taken care of my younger brothers when they were babies, but this was totally different, this person will come from me. I can’t hand the baby over to somebody else when there’s something wrong.
Everyday I was drowning in emotions. I was happy because I’ll have a baby, worried how can I take care of the baby when I don’t have any mommy instincts in me, depressed how can P and I provide for this baby? Seems like all the things mentioned in the book What to Expect, I went through.
The moment I was able to hold my son in my arms for the first time it felt like a motherhood switch was turned on. It felt like I finally knew what to do. It felt like I was meant to be a mom. Maybe I was one of the lucky ones to feel the motherhood vibe, that Johnson and Johnson mommy – child bonding, with tears rolling down the cheeks. Cheesy, but it’s true.
I wasn’t prepared for motherhood and being a mom, but I wasn’t prepared for the surprise that all the while I had it in me to be a mom. My son just had to turn on that switch. And after three wonderful kids, it feels like I have been doing this forever.
i also consider myself as a non domestic diva.
click on the title to go to their site
------
I wasn’t prepared for motherhood.
When P and I were still dating, both at a very young age of 23, both climbing the corporate ladder and establishing our careers in sales, P for an FMCG, while I was working for an local online portal in sales. The thought of being parents never crossed our minds. We were enjoying the moment of going out on impromptu road trips, dates after work, getting pissed drunk and not worrying about it the next day. That time, we were living the “perfect” life.
I never imagined myself being a mom. I had this idea that I would marry when I turn 30, with a well compensated job and maybe 1 kid. But then fate took a different course (not that I’m blaming fate), in 2004, I found out I was pregnant. The moment I saw those to pink lines I didn’t know what to do. I could not fathom the idea that at the age of 23, I was going to be a mom. I was still childish. I didn’t have a 5 year plan, long term goals and all that adult stuff. I lived in the moment.
How could I be a mom this young? I didn’t have any domestic skills at all. I can’t even cook a decent meal, I hated the thought of washing and ironing clothes, cleaning the house was literally a chore. What more, taking care of an infant? It took me the whole pregnancy to deal with these issues. I was scared, worried. Sure, I had taken care of my younger brothers when they were babies, but this was totally different, this person will come from me. I can’t hand the baby over to somebody else when there’s something wrong.
Everyday I was drowning in emotions. I was happy because I’ll have a baby, worried how can I take care of the baby when I don’t have any mommy instincts in me, depressed how can P and I provide for this baby? Seems like all the things mentioned in the book What to Expect, I went through.
The moment I was able to hold my son in my arms for the first time it felt like a motherhood switch was turned on. It felt like I finally knew what to do. It felt like I was meant to be a mom. Maybe I was one of the lucky ones to feel the motherhood vibe, that Johnson and Johnson mommy – child bonding, with tears rolling down the cheeks. Cheesy, but it’s true.
I wasn’t prepared for motherhood and being a mom, but I wasn’t prepared for the surprise that all the while I had it in me to be a mom. My son just had to turn on that switch. And after three wonderful kids, it feels like I have been doing this forever.
Monday, February 22, 2010
we found a gem in yaya jackie
i was venting out before that i was in dire need of a yaya for kade. and god has answered our prayers. the time that the yaya we got left just before new year's day, there was an angel who was waiting on the wings. thank god for our loyal labandera/plantsadora who was able to talk to her daughter's best friend to work for us. thankfully she was also in need of work.
aling ton (our plantsadora) arrived around 7 in the morning. i woke up 30 mins after and was surprised to see a new face sweeping the floor! she introduced herself and greeted me. (plus points already). i told her to give me a few minutes since i just woke up and kade's still sleeping.
jackie is 28 years old from bicol. i knew right there she will be a good caregiver. she has this pleasant aura about her. the moment i let her hold kade i knew the two of them would get along. and they did quite nicely.
she's been with us over a month but the bond that she has with kade is commendable. when i'm home, kade's all over me, but when i'm not, it's ate jackie or no one.
i just trained her for a week about her tasks and duties but she exceeded our expectations. everything's done by the time kade's awake. clothes have been washed, floors sweeped, the crib ready for kade. also with the help of keon's yaya, who, is a gem as well.
aling ton (our plantsadora) arrived around 7 in the morning. i woke up 30 mins after and was surprised to see a new face sweeping the floor! she introduced herself and greeted me. (plus points already). i told her to give me a few minutes since i just woke up and kade's still sleeping.
jackie is 28 years old from bicol. i knew right there she will be a good caregiver. she has this pleasant aura about her. the moment i let her hold kade i knew the two of them would get along. and they did quite nicely.
she's been with us over a month but the bond that she has with kade is commendable. when i'm home, kade's all over me, but when i'm not, it's ate jackie or no one.
i just trained her for a week about her tasks and duties but she exceeded our expectations. everything's done by the time kade's awake. clothes have been washed, floors sweeped, the crib ready for kade. also with the help of keon's yaya, who, is a gem as well.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
the quest for the yaya
as mentioned before, we were faced with the dilemma of looking for a yaya at the last minute because kyle's yaya left at the last minute because of a scruffle. i don't want to go into the details anymore since we've forgiven and forgotten the incident already. we've found a new yaya for kyle/kade, albeit temporarily since she lasted only 3 weeks with us. i can't blame her since she's a mother as well and looking after your kid is every mom's priority. again, we're grateful for the service she gave us, she was a gem but we have to let her go.
anyway, just a little rant while i'm on the topic of yaya hunting. i was able to get a referral from a friend who knows this person who let's say searches for potential yayas. i got in touch with her. after a few sms exchanges, and a short notice meeting, we agreed. hubby and i agreed to travel all the way to commonwealth with the promise that she'll meet with us binging with her the potential yaya. we arrived at 9pm. traffic was hell but we took it all in, for the sake of finding a yaya. we even had kade in tow with us.
after a few sms with her, i found it quite odd that since she's within the area, she was no yet there. i called her up, asked her where she was. the exchange that followed was quite odd:
me: ate nasaan na po kayo? andito na po kami
ate: ay sandali lang po, wala pa po kami dyan, hinihintay ko pa po yung yaya para sa inyo.
me: akala ko po ba na kasama nyo na siya?
ate: ay umalis lang po saglit. magkita na lang po tayo sa may mcdo. i text ko na lang po kayo
me: matagal pa po ba yan kasi alas-9 na po eh taga makati pa po kami.
ate: opo. pahintay na lang po
from there, it was quite odd already. my paranoid self was screaming inside. we must leave now, i think smell a scam. i told hubby to wait for a few mintues, if she texts me, then we'll meet her if she doesn't we'll leave. we waited, had a late dinner even and no text. so i sent her a last message that we can't wait for her anymore and we're leaving. she then sends a message: ay mam, paalis na po kami. mauuna na lang ako para ma meet ko na rin kayo tapos papasunod ko na lang siya dito.
but i declined and told here we've left already. i told her i'll get in touch with her next time if we need her again (i guess this is never haha)
so we went home yaya-less. again.
but blessings come in the form of surprises and the next day my mom told me that she found a yaya for us. (the one mentioned earlier that had to leave after 3 weeks).
but we weren't left yaya less again for long, after a few days, with the help of our trusted labandera/plantsadora, she broguth with her one friday morning our new yaya. and so far she's good. nice to the kids, very attentive, takes initiative and very easy to talk to. i sure hope this one stays longer. this time i'm crossing my fingers.
anyway, just a little rant while i'm on the topic of yaya hunting. i was able to get a referral from a friend who knows this person who let's say searches for potential yayas. i got in touch with her. after a few sms exchanges, and a short notice meeting, we agreed. hubby and i agreed to travel all the way to commonwealth with the promise that she'll meet with us binging with her the potential yaya. we arrived at 9pm. traffic was hell but we took it all in, for the sake of finding a yaya. we even had kade in tow with us.
after a few sms with her, i found it quite odd that since she's within the area, she was no yet there. i called her up, asked her where she was. the exchange that followed was quite odd:
me: ate nasaan na po kayo? andito na po kami
ate: ay sandali lang po, wala pa po kami dyan, hinihintay ko pa po yung yaya para sa inyo.
me: akala ko po ba na kasama nyo na siya?
ate: ay umalis lang po saglit. magkita na lang po tayo sa may mcdo. i text ko na lang po kayo
me: matagal pa po ba yan kasi alas-9 na po eh taga makati pa po kami.
ate: opo. pahintay na lang po
from there, it was quite odd already. my paranoid self was screaming inside. we must leave now, i think smell a scam. i told hubby to wait for a few mintues, if she texts me, then we'll meet her if she doesn't we'll leave. we waited, had a late dinner even and no text. so i sent her a last message that we can't wait for her anymore and we're leaving. she then sends a message: ay mam, paalis na po kami. mauuna na lang ako para ma meet ko na rin kayo tapos papasunod ko na lang siya dito.
but i declined and told here we've left already. i told her i'll get in touch with her next time if we need her again (i guess this is never haha)
so we went home yaya-less. again.
but blessings come in the form of surprises and the next day my mom told me that she found a yaya for us. (the one mentioned earlier that had to leave after 3 weeks).
but we weren't left yaya less again for long, after a few days, with the help of our trusted labandera/plantsadora, she broguth with her one friday morning our new yaya. and so far she's good. nice to the kids, very attentive, takes initiative and very easy to talk to. i sure hope this one stays longer. this time i'm crossing my fingers.
Monday, December 7, 2009
dr. mommy
weekends are supposed to be a fun time for my 3 kiddos. but unfortunately, this weekend was a bit of a downer. kuya kyle, woke up saturday morning with a fever. a whopping 39 degrees. thank god he's one of the lucky ones who didn't have any febrile seisures. but he was quite lethargic and was camped on the living room sofa sleeping.
he was complaining of an itchy throat. so it was a confirmation that we were on the onset of tonsilitis.
come sunday night, he was back to normal but still running a 38 degree fever. the only consolation was hbo was good to us. he got to watch shrek 3 and kung fu panda.
so tomorrow, off to the pedia for a check up just to make sure. :)
he was complaining of an itchy throat. so it was a confirmation that we were on the onset of tonsilitis.
come sunday night, he was back to normal but still running a 38 degree fever. the only consolation was hbo was good to us. he got to watch shrek 3 and kung fu panda.
so tomorrow, off to the pedia for a check up just to make sure. :)
Saturday, September 19, 2009
what would you do?
if you're faced with two kids crying over one toy?
a. let it go and let them figure it out for themselves
b. give one each of the same toy
c. give a different activity for each child
d. do nothing
i did all four and well, each option works depending on the kid's temperament. i've been through hell being mommy referee. i can't comfort one and leave the other one. it's all a matter of compromise and my kids have taught me how to.
amazing how kids can teach you life lessons.
now i'm working my muscles to be mommy referee again, this time to three fighting boys soon. good luck to me! and i hope there's another lesson in there somewhere.
a. let it go and let them figure it out for themselves
b. give one each of the same toy
c. give a different activity for each child
d. do nothing
i did all four and well, each option works depending on the kid's temperament. i've been through hell being mommy referee. i can't comfort one and leave the other one. it's all a matter of compromise and my kids have taught me how to.
amazing how kids can teach you life lessons.
now i'm working my muscles to be mommy referee again, this time to three fighting boys soon. good luck to me! and i hope there's another lesson in there somewhere.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
protecting myself
after 3 kids, my ob had scolded me for having kids 2 years each apart. she was worried that my boy hasn't recovered yet from the previous pregnancy. but, what were we to do now that i was carrying our third child right? so she told me, imposed actually that after i give birth, she'll put me on contraceptives. i obliged since it was in the plan initially after keon, but due to some miraculous intervention, kade was created.
we discussed what would be the right one for me. i told her i'm not reliable to take pills daily since i have the memory of a goldfish when it comes to taking medicine. patches, i might not afford it, IUD, too scary for me and so, we decided injectibles are the way to go. and all i have to do is to come back every three months for my injections.
of course i did my research about the good and the bad effects of injectibles (Depo Provera) from this source
i just had my first shot two weeks ago. so far i just have some spotting. the bloated feeling my ob warned me about hadn't taken effect yet, but i am praying it won't happen at all. what i am dreading is the weight gain. so right now, i'm starting to watch my weight and do everything i can to maintain my ideal weight of 115lbs. once i go back to work, i'm sure things would be easier since i'm more mobile and up and about.
hubby and i will soon test it's effectiveness. but not now or in the coming weeks or months. it's to risky yet since this is my first dose. i guess after my 3rd dose.
we discussed what would be the right one for me. i told her i'm not reliable to take pills daily since i have the memory of a goldfish when it comes to taking medicine. patches, i might not afford it, IUD, too scary for me and so, we decided injectibles are the way to go. and all i have to do is to come back every three months for my injections.
of course i did my research about the good and the bad effects of injectibles (Depo Provera) from this source
i just had my first shot two weeks ago. so far i just have some spotting. the bloated feeling my ob warned me about hadn't taken effect yet, but i am praying it won't happen at all. what i am dreading is the weight gain. so right now, i'm starting to watch my weight and do everything i can to maintain my ideal weight of 115lbs. once i go back to work, i'm sure things would be easier since i'm more mobile and up and about.
hubby and i will soon test it's effectiveness. but not now or in the coming weeks or months. it's to risky yet since this is my first dose. i guess after my 3rd dose.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
5 weeks
pardon the post partum drama laden blog post...
i was reading Daphne Osena's blog a few minutes ago and i came across one of her blog entries. she recently gave birth as well and more or less, we're in the same boat. and this blog entry validates what i have been going through.
in a way i can relate to her. having three kids, opting to not have a nanny for the third child and taking care of the household while at the same time, taking care of a demanding newborn.
the only difference is that she blogged about it on her 17th week of being with her newborn, i, on the otherhand, is just a few days shy of my 6th week post partum and here i am all drained, exhausted, semi depressed, and moody. 2 weeks or more to go and i'm back to work. half of me is dreading going back to work, half of me is looking forward to it.
it feels like after having this third angel has finally taken its toll on me. i seriously had a few years of rest, then i'm back to being pregnant again. i guess my body never had the full chance to recover from the first pregnancy. i have been looking in the mirror lately and i am not liking what i see. i look older than my age, i'm starting to grow some lines - worry lines, getting old lines in my face, my skin looks blotchy and dry, and a ton more. it's quite depressing really. and as much as i would want a total makeover, i'd rather spend the money i'm going to use on it for the kids.
i just hope that in the coming weeks, months or year, i can redeem myself and hopefully return to what i should look like in my age - or even just half of it.
i was reading Daphne Osena's blog a few minutes ago and i came across one of her blog entries. she recently gave birth as well and more or less, we're in the same boat. and this blog entry validates what i have been going through.
in a way i can relate to her. having three kids, opting to not have a nanny for the third child and taking care of the household while at the same time, taking care of a demanding newborn.
the only difference is that she blogged about it on her 17th week of being with her newborn, i, on the otherhand, is just a few days shy of my 6th week post partum and here i am all drained, exhausted, semi depressed, and moody. 2 weeks or more to go and i'm back to work. half of me is dreading going back to work, half of me is looking forward to it.
it feels like after having this third angel has finally taken its toll on me. i seriously had a few years of rest, then i'm back to being pregnant again. i guess my body never had the full chance to recover from the first pregnancy. i have been looking in the mirror lately and i am not liking what i see. i look older than my age, i'm starting to grow some lines - worry lines, getting old lines in my face, my skin looks blotchy and dry, and a ton more. it's quite depressing really. and as much as i would want a total makeover, i'd rather spend the money i'm going to use on it for the kids.
i just hope that in the coming weeks, months or year, i can redeem myself and hopefully return to what i should look like in my age - or even just half of it.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
the delinquent blogger mommy
i missed blogging so much. but taking care of a newborn - well, almost a month old baby, takes up 80% of my day. the 20% goes to the other two kids, and a little me time that i get as much as i can.
this me time would be spent online checking up on my friends, my social networks etc. i really can't let go of my online life.
i have a lot of things lined up to be blogged about:
> kade's birthing story
> kyle's 4th birthday
> keon's milestones
> taking care of a newborn all over again
> having the baby blues
> hubby's promotion - the ups and the downs
> and the other things i discovered here and there
but i'm taking it one day at a time. soon, i'll be able to complete this list.
and yeah, i am looking forward to going back to work but i'm torn in leaving kade at home. we still have to work on a schedule since we won't get kade a nanny. our 2 nannies would take turns in taking care of him in the meantime. i sure hope, our schedule works. but we're still crossing our fingers on this - wish us luck!
this me time would be spent online checking up on my friends, my social networks etc. i really can't let go of my online life.
i have a lot of things lined up to be blogged about:
> kade's birthing story
> kyle's 4th birthday
> keon's milestones
> taking care of a newborn all over again
> having the baby blues
> hubby's promotion - the ups and the downs
> and the other things i discovered here and there
but i'm taking it one day at a time. soon, i'll be able to complete this list.
and yeah, i am looking forward to going back to work but i'm torn in leaving kade at home. we still have to work on a schedule since we won't get kade a nanny. our 2 nannies would take turns in taking care of him in the meantime. i sure hope, our schedule works. but we're still crossing our fingers on this - wish us luck!
Monday, May 18, 2009
a little more each day
my kyle is a little boy no more. everyday, he learns something new and it amazes me that in just a few months, i'll have a 4 year old as a first born. how time flies that he has been quite dependent. a few things he can do on his own:
> go to the potty to pee
> take off his clothes before taking a bath
> get water
> eat on his own using adult sized utensils (bitin siya when he uses those kiddie sized ones)
> try to tie his shoelaces
and the latest achievement since last night: he can finally write his name without any assistance.
i got so teary-eyed that here is my little boy gaining more independence each day. part of me got scared that one day, he won't need me anymore. part of me wanted to keep him like that forever.
it was such a milestone for kyle and i because all the effort we went through in learning the letters of his name, to actually trying to write it on paper. he can already spell out his name (in case he gets lost daw (oh dear) and tell the guard his name.
i can't wait for his next milestone. i may not get to spend 100% of my time with him but i am happy that i still get to see his milestones. that i somehow get blessed in getting the chance to actually witness it for the first time. this is such a reward for me as a mom. not only to kyle but also to keon who, is sharing his own milestones with me.
i am truly blessed to have such wonderful kids. i can't wait what this third little wonder can do in the future.
> go to the potty to pee
> take off his clothes before taking a bath
> get water
> eat on his own using adult sized utensils (bitin siya when he uses those kiddie sized ones)
> try to tie his shoelaces
and the latest achievement since last night: he can finally write his name without any assistance.
i got so teary-eyed that here is my little boy gaining more independence each day. part of me got scared that one day, he won't need me anymore. part of me wanted to keep him like that forever.
it was such a milestone for kyle and i because all the effort we went through in learning the letters of his name, to actually trying to write it on paper. he can already spell out his name (in case he gets lost daw (oh dear) and tell the guard his name.
i can't wait for his next milestone. i may not get to spend 100% of my time with him but i am happy that i still get to see his milestones. that i somehow get blessed in getting the chance to actually witness it for the first time. this is such a reward for me as a mom. not only to kyle but also to keon who, is sharing his own milestones with me.
i am truly blessed to have such wonderful kids. i can't wait what this third little wonder can do in the future.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Project Potty: Keon a Success!
for the past 2 months, we have been successful in training keon to use the potty for both weewee and poopoo. and so far he has been diaper-free in the mornings with a few accidents here and there. which, is ok with us since it's a bit early for him to even tell us he wants to go.
what i do is i watch his cues. if he keeps on touching his tutuy it means he wants to go weewee. and i would ask his dad to lead him to the potty and carry him. my kids have taken to use the potty for adults and hates those kiddie potty things. after the deed is done, he would then flush the toilet and wash his hands. how's that for a 2 year old?
as for the poopoo, we have to be really vigilant and keep a watchful eye on him. but thankfully, he goes poopoo on scheduled times during the day. save for the usual accidents again where he would be so engrossed in playing that by the time we go to the potty, we've left a trail of poopoo like breadcrumbs haha.
overall, i have been so proud of my kid's milestones and progress. i could not believe that at this early my boys have learned to go on their own.
before i know it, they're too grown up for me to even give them their baths. huhuhu...
what i do is i watch his cues. if he keeps on touching his tutuy it means he wants to go weewee. and i would ask his dad to lead him to the potty and carry him. my kids have taken to use the potty for adults and hates those kiddie potty things. after the deed is done, he would then flush the toilet and wash his hands. how's that for a 2 year old?
as for the poopoo, we have to be really vigilant and keep a watchful eye on him. but thankfully, he goes poopoo on scheduled times during the day. save for the usual accidents again where he would be so engrossed in playing that by the time we go to the potty, we've left a trail of poopoo like breadcrumbs haha.
overall, i have been so proud of my kid's milestones and progress. i could not believe that at this early my boys have learned to go on their own.
before i know it, they're too grown up for me to even give them their baths. huhuhu...
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
kyle and the art of whining
thank god for parenting.com and i am somehow prepared for the whining sessions. i admit even if i prepared myself for this, it is still quite annoying and irritating. but dealing with it comes easy.
to share a few tips and tricks:
> give them a few mintues of your attention or time. give them more hugs, tickles or even a cracker or two. the whining may just be a small bout of hunger or boredom.
> let him hear that the whining sound he makes is not nice and turn it into a funny scene. in short laugh it off, your toddler might not notice that he is in fact whining. (this one works between kyle and i)
> do the exact opposite of what they're doing, if they're whining loudly, answer them back in a whisper. or as if you're telling a secret. this would hold your toddler's attention.
or just give it to them straight. let them know that when they whine, you can't understand them and the only time you can talk to them if they stop whining. this one also works for me and kyle. just keep your calm voice so that your toddler can replicate your mood and everything will flow smoothly. but there will be days that you do get to slip and cave in to the anger and answer back to your kid and a war ensues. it's ok, we're moms, they're kids, we're just human. it's part of the mommy-kids cycle. we get to live with it.
and of course, you have to reward your kid for the good behavior be it an affirmation of him being able to follow your instructions or a hug or a kiss. something that reinforces their good behavior/attitude.
but you won't get it the first time. it's a trial and error thing until you and your toddler gets used to it and before you know it, the whining is over and you're conversing with your toddler like an adult. :)
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
to the graduate!
i just could not imagine that my little boy has now finished one chapter in his life. his first graduation/moving up day/recognition day. it has been a joy to see him excel and become such a big boy in a span of a year.
he has improved a lot ever since he started school and his teacher told me. what was once a shy, clingy, stuttering boy is now a confident, brave, independent and oh so talkative little man that he is now.
to our first graduate, my kyle xavier, mommy and daddy couldn't be more proud of what you have become.
to more milestones and graduations my dear boy. =)
Monday, October 27, 2008
fighting over the weekend
it was a great feeling that a "fight" happened over the weekend. no, it's not a typical fight where people got physical. it was a matter of my two boys fighting for mommy's attention.
it was a good feeling indeed. my boys missed me so much after going home during the weekdays later than usual. the weekend compensated for everything.
if only i captured the moment on video and keep it forever.
and to the dismay of their daddy, because my boys are definitely mommy's boys. but in due time, they'll be daddy's barkada and i'll be the enemy. but for now, this is my moment. :)
it was a good feeling indeed. my boys missed me so much after going home during the weekdays later than usual. the weekend compensated for everything.
if only i captured the moment on video and keep it forever.
and to the dismay of their daddy, because my boys are definitely mommy's boys. but in due time, they'll be daddy's barkada and i'll be the enemy. but for now, this is my moment. :)
Monday, October 13, 2008
weekend tidbits
this is what i get when kyle catches me plurking: Kyle's turn at Plurking
and when he discovers the joy of the dancing banana and the other emoticons of plurk.
seriously i am not surprised, it is his generation of techie stuff. and it never bothers me that he knows how to navigate youtube when he requests to watch episodes of thomas the tank.
next thing i'll know, he'll have his own blog and would rant about having a mom like me. haha
and when he discovers the joy of the dancing banana and the other emoticons of plurk.
seriously i am not surprised, it is his generation of techie stuff. and it never bothers me that he knows how to navigate youtube when he requests to watch episodes of thomas the tank.
next thing i'll know, he'll have his own blog and would rant about having a mom like me. haha
Thursday, October 9, 2008
last night's trip to the er
a few minutes after arriving home, one of the worst things i could have ever encountered as a mom happened. sure, there were accidents considering i am raising tow rowdy boys under the age of 4.
so anyway, while the nannies were clearing the dishes, kyle and keon running around the house. one thing led to another. kyle was running as usual, keon was standing still while eyeing a cartoon on the disney channel when suddely kyle collided with keon, and keon, well, bumped his head on the wall.
at first i thoughtit was just a bump, but hs cries told me otherwise. and then blood came gushing out. lots of them. i was panicking telling aishi that this is not the usual scrape on the head. it was literally a gaping hole on his forehead. my clothes were soaked with his blood. everybody was panicking, mom was trying to put betadine on his head, his nanny distracting him, while my little one was crying his eyes out. i told mom that this cannot be remedied anymore at home. so we had to take keon to the ER now.
kyle on the other hand, while everybody was preparing, sat quietly on the sofa. he kept on saying sorry keon, sorry keon. i guess, due to the panicking, aishi wasn't able to control himself and shouted at him causing fear and confusion with kyle. so i sat beside him, gave keon to his nanny for a bit. and told him that what he did was not his fault, he just has to make sure that next time it won't happen again.
so off we went to the ER. from the moment we entered the treatment area, to waiting for the bill, keon was crying his eyes out. can't blame him, his would was really big and thankfully, the ER doctors were patient and understanding.
as much as i would want to do a blow by blow account of everything, i can't. half of i was all a blur. and personally i hate going to emergency rooms.
by the time we got home, keon was calm, ok, back to his usual self dictating all the letters he sees. and was sleeping after 15 minutes.
i'm just happy that nothing bad happened to keon or kyle. the funny side to this though is that both brothers have been marked with scars from being too "malikot". but kyle still leads 2 to 1.
Here's keon this morning with the wound all covered up:
little harry potter in the making with that scar. hehe
so anyway, while the nannies were clearing the dishes, kyle and keon running around the house. one thing led to another. kyle was running as usual, keon was standing still while eyeing a cartoon on the disney channel when suddely kyle collided with keon, and keon, well, bumped his head on the wall.
at first i thoughtit was just a bump, but hs cries told me otherwise. and then blood came gushing out. lots of them. i was panicking telling aishi that this is not the usual scrape on the head. it was literally a gaping hole on his forehead. my clothes were soaked with his blood. everybody was panicking, mom was trying to put betadine on his head, his nanny distracting him, while my little one was crying his eyes out. i told mom that this cannot be remedied anymore at home. so we had to take keon to the ER now.
kyle on the other hand, while everybody was preparing, sat quietly on the sofa. he kept on saying sorry keon, sorry keon. i guess, due to the panicking, aishi wasn't able to control himself and shouted at him causing fear and confusion with kyle. so i sat beside him, gave keon to his nanny for a bit. and told him that what he did was not his fault, he just has to make sure that next time it won't happen again.
so off we went to the ER. from the moment we entered the treatment area, to waiting for the bill, keon was crying his eyes out. can't blame him, his would was really big and thankfully, the ER doctors were patient and understanding.
as much as i would want to do a blow by blow account of everything, i can't. half of i was all a blur. and personally i hate going to emergency rooms.
by the time we got home, keon was calm, ok, back to his usual self dictating all the letters he sees. and was sleeping after 15 minutes.
i'm just happy that nothing bad happened to keon or kyle. the funny side to this though is that both brothers have been marked with scars from being too "malikot". but kyle still leads 2 to 1.
Here's keon this morning with the wound all covered up:
little harry potter in the making with that scar. hehe
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
terrible twos part 2- the keon chronicles
we're back on the the terrible twos bandwagon, this time with keon. i blogged about Kyle's terrible twos and as much as i avoid comparing the two, it's quite different and literally a whole new experience for us.
it's amazing how i am raising two different individuals at such a young age.
keon's almost there with a few months to spare hitting the big 2, and he has started with his mood swings. to enumerate:
> his crying has become frequent. from crying because he wants to go upstairs to crying because he wants to play with his kuya's toys.
> to waking up in the middle of the night crying, and wouldn't want to be put down. so i had to try to sleep while carrying him - sitting.
> to using me or his nanny to manipulate us into doing the things he want. going outside, refusing to take a bath or preferring a certain toy while taking a bath, playing with my laptop while i work/surf at home, asking for food if he sees someone eating to basically anything and everything to get what he wants.
> hates the fact that when i say no. and would resort to going to daddy to appeal his case.
> knowing how to fight back when his kuya gets to bully him.
and the list goes on...
my little man is quite the character compared to his kuya. he can make fun of his kuya when kyle's the one throwing the tantrums, but is quite the relief since kyle would then stop crying out of humiliation because his shoti's laughing at him. which works everytime. what he does is he squats infront of his kuya and mock him - laughing or imitating his cry.
but the thing is, i'm usually at the losing end when it's his turn throwing tantrums, one minute he wants me to be his protector, the next i'm the enemy. there are times that he would run to his nanny asking for sympathy. good thing his nanny knows better.
thank god for parenting resources on how to handle the terrible twos or else i would have cried my eyes out with kyle and keon.
how did you handle your child's terrible twos?
it's amazing how i am raising two different individuals at such a young age.
keon's almost there with a few months to spare hitting the big 2, and he has started with his mood swings. to enumerate:
> his crying has become frequent. from crying because he wants to go upstairs to crying because he wants to play with his kuya's toys.
> to waking up in the middle of the night crying, and wouldn't want to be put down. so i had to try to sleep while carrying him - sitting.
> to using me or his nanny to manipulate us into doing the things he want. going outside, refusing to take a bath or preferring a certain toy while taking a bath, playing with my laptop while i work/surf at home, asking for food if he sees someone eating to basically anything and everything to get what he wants.
> hates the fact that when i say no. and would resort to going to daddy to appeal his case.
> knowing how to fight back when his kuya gets to bully him.
and the list goes on...
my little man is quite the character compared to his kuya. he can make fun of his kuya when kyle's the one throwing the tantrums, but is quite the relief since kyle would then stop crying out of humiliation because his shoti's laughing at him. which works everytime. what he does is he squats infront of his kuya and mock him - laughing or imitating his cry.
but the thing is, i'm usually at the losing end when it's his turn throwing tantrums, one minute he wants me to be his protector, the next i'm the enemy. there are times that he would run to his nanny asking for sympathy. good thing his nanny knows better.
thank god for parenting resources on how to handle the terrible twos or else i would have cried my eyes out with kyle and keon.
how did you handle your child's terrible twos?
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
PPBC # 6: What type of Parent are you?
This edition is hosted by Daddy Angel, you can view the submissions here:
Today's Topic: What type of Parent are you?
From what i noticed with myself in terms of taking care of the kids, i'm more of a mom-in-between. i'd like to think of myself as the fun mom/parent but at the same time the disciplinarian as well.
Me being the fun mom: i've created a lot of make believe games and funny tricks to make my kids go to bed, eat their meals, stay put or just do what they're being told to do. and not to bad mouth hubby or anything, but for obvious reasons, the kids prefer to play with mommy than with daddy. i find it heartbreaking for hubby's part but, you have to give him credit in making all the effort for them to play with him. on the lighter side is, the kids have their own games with daddy as compared to mine. so i guess it's just a matter of preference and mood.
Me as a disciplinarian: there are times when they do test my patience, i do give them warnings, when i exhausted 3 warnings and they still continue to do it, i get their hands, palms facing up and spank them - not too gentle and not too hard either. just enough to let them feel the spank. but then after the deed, i explain to them what merited them the spanking. amazingly, we only had a few lapses. the spankings are at a minimal level since they know when to stop when they hear mommy's angry voice and see mommy's angry face.
Personally, i think i'm a student parent as well. i learn so much from my kids that i can never learn from school. my kids are one of the best teachers. i've learned to appreciate the little things, to laugh all out and without a care in the world, that it's ok to ask, that nap times are the best, hugs and kisses are free, that it's ok to cry. and in return i teach them to figure things out for themselves, to pursue what they want, never be afraid to be curious, to fight for what they believe is right, the privilege to argue/debate, and to know that we, as their parents can be their friends as well.
wow. i had fun with this week's topic. looking forward to the coming topics!
Today's Topic: What type of Parent are you?
From what i noticed with myself in terms of taking care of the kids, i'm more of a mom-in-between. i'd like to think of myself as the fun mom/parent but at the same time the disciplinarian as well.
Me being the fun mom: i've created a lot of make believe games and funny tricks to make my kids go to bed, eat their meals, stay put or just do what they're being told to do. and not to bad mouth hubby or anything, but for obvious reasons, the kids prefer to play with mommy than with daddy. i find it heartbreaking for hubby's part but, you have to give him credit in making all the effort for them to play with him. on the lighter side is, the kids have their own games with daddy as compared to mine. so i guess it's just a matter of preference and mood.
Me as a disciplinarian: there are times when they do test my patience, i do give them warnings, when i exhausted 3 warnings and they still continue to do it, i get their hands, palms facing up and spank them - not too gentle and not too hard either. just enough to let them feel the spank. but then after the deed, i explain to them what merited them the spanking. amazingly, we only had a few lapses. the spankings are at a minimal level since they know when to stop when they hear mommy's angry voice and see mommy's angry face.
Personally, i think i'm a student parent as well. i learn so much from my kids that i can never learn from school. my kids are one of the best teachers. i've learned to appreciate the little things, to laugh all out and without a care in the world, that it's ok to ask, that nap times are the best, hugs and kisses are free, that it's ok to cry. and in return i teach them to figure things out for themselves, to pursue what they want, never be afraid to be curious, to fight for what they believe is right, the privilege to argue/debate, and to know that we, as their parents can be their friends as well.
wow. i had fun with this week's topic. looking forward to the coming topics!
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
if only it was that easy kid...
i seriously envy those moms who have jumped the fence to stay at home mommy-hood. the perks of being with your kids 24/7.
sadly i'm one of the few who has to work to make ends meet (dramatic yes) and to save up for their futures. not that i'm saying sahms are not earning. the mommy bloggers are quite the rage now and an emerging target market. i'm just happy and blessed that with the work i have, i can still blog and earn while meeting deadlines, making presentations, and reaching quotas. good thing the paid opps are usually given at night so there's no conflict with work. one click of the publish button and i'm done.
so anyway, the point of this entry is that, i wanted to share something my eldest kyle told me. he's been quite vocal already and the conversations that we have are quite entertaining. it feels like i'm not talking to a 3 year old but someone much older than he is.
it was only last week when we were both watching cartoons while waiting for his schoolbus to arrive when he told me this:
"mommy, don't go office na ha? stay here with kyle and keon. wait for me to go home after school"
right then and there my heart melted at the though that my son wanted to be with me more than the hours we spend when i get home from work. admittedly, i had a few lapses. i came home late seeing him peacefully asleep. keon, on the other hand has been prepped for bedtime.
i wanted so much to drop everything and not go to work at all. to bug and cuddle and play with my kids all day.
but reality-wise, it's not that practical at all. as much as i would want to, there's this me inside with pride that would prefer to work and earn money through my own efforts and struggles. i'd rather not let all the burden fall on aishi's hands. as long as we're here in this country, i have to make sacrifices.
maybe, when we get to migrate in 2 year's time. things might make a 360 degree turn.
but for now, kyle and keon, it's not that easy. but soon. mommy will find a way. i want to be a WAHM you know...
sadly i'm one of the few who has to work to make ends meet (dramatic yes) and to save up for their futures. not that i'm saying sahms are not earning. the mommy bloggers are quite the rage now and an emerging target market. i'm just happy and blessed that with the work i have, i can still blog and earn while meeting deadlines, making presentations, and reaching quotas. good thing the paid opps are usually given at night so there's no conflict with work. one click of the publish button and i'm done.
so anyway, the point of this entry is that, i wanted to share something my eldest kyle told me. he's been quite vocal already and the conversations that we have are quite entertaining. it feels like i'm not talking to a 3 year old but someone much older than he is.
it was only last week when we were both watching cartoons while waiting for his schoolbus to arrive when he told me this:
"mommy, don't go office na ha? stay here with kyle and keon. wait for me to go home after school"
right then and there my heart melted at the though that my son wanted to be with me more than the hours we spend when i get home from work. admittedly, i had a few lapses. i came home late seeing him peacefully asleep. keon, on the other hand has been prepped for bedtime.
i wanted so much to drop everything and not go to work at all. to bug and cuddle and play with my kids all day.
but reality-wise, it's not that practical at all. as much as i would want to, there's this me inside with pride that would prefer to work and earn money through my own efforts and struggles. i'd rather not let all the burden fall on aishi's hands. as long as we're here in this country, i have to make sacrifices.
maybe, when we get to migrate in 2 year's time. things might make a 360 degree turn.
but for now, kyle and keon, it's not that easy. but soon. mommy will find a way. i want to be a WAHM you know...
Monday, July 21, 2008
21 ways to enjoy being a mom
credits to Parenting.com who has been a great resource and life saver when i am literally in the dark in handling two toddlers.
i may be this steady mom to some friends who looks like parenting is a breeze, but if not for parenting.com and babycenter. i would be frazzled, wallowing in 2 post partum depressions and haggard looking 26 year old.
this is to all the moms and dads out there! Parenting Rocks!
21 ways to enjoy being a mom
1. When you're tired, hand your kids a brush, point to your head, and tell them to play beauty parlor. When you're really tired, pretend that you're Sleeping Beauty. - amen!
2. Take your mother to a spa. While you're both getting seaweed wraps, tell her all your favorite memories of growing up. - i think this would be impossible. haha!
3. Take a bath with your infant. Make sure your husband is around for the handoff, so you can relax until the last minute. (Don't forget to smell your baby right afterward. Heaven!) - exactly!
4. At the end of every summer, take a family photo for the holiday card (you'll be happy to have this accomplished once December comes). Every year, add a framed 11-by-14-inch print to your front hall. Your kids will be proud now and laugh later at the funny styles. - this is in the family pipeline (that sounds very sales-like! haha)
5. On St. Patrick's Day, dye the milk and eggs green and turn the furniture upside down so your home looks like total chaos. When your little ones wake up, tell them that the leprechauns came.
6. The next time you have to go to a boring kiddie activity, invite another mom-friend along. Hide wine in sippy cups for the two of you to nurse undercover. -haha nice idea!
7. Play Freaky Friday with your husband and switch roles for a day. Enjoy his renewed appreciation for his Super Mom wife. - i know!!
8. . In the dead of winter, fix some snacks, get under warm quilts, and watch Happy Feet on DVD. Tell your kids you love them even more than the penguins love their chicks. - no winter here in the Philippines but this is a great idea!
9. Go to the beach in the off-season. Throw rocks in the water and collect shells. Put them in a vase and use it as shelf decor in your living room.
10. Skip the Raffi and Barney. Turn your kids on to Bob Marley, They Might Be Giants, and Gwen Stefani. - hey, where's the beatles, the who, incubus etc?
11. Take your baby out to the movies at night. (Infants love the dark, and loud trailers make them snooze immediately.) Then you can sip your soda and munch your popcorn in peace. - is this true?
12. Buy yourself that fancy watch, strand of pearls, or whatever piece of expensive jewelry you've been lusting after. Justify your purchase by rationalizing that you'll pass it down to your daughter (or son's wife) eventually. -haha! i'll leave this to hubby. books for me. :)
13. Take your kids to live music performances from very early ages. Cheap ones outdoors are great to start with in case you need to make a hasty exit (like when a diaper explodes).
14. Use your kids as an excuse to do the things you want to do, like going to silly feel-good movies, eating mac and cheese for dinner, and jumping in the moonbounce. Use your kids as an excuse to get out of things you don't want to do, like going to a wedding or office party. - oh yes!
15. Every Mother's Day, have a picture taken with your kids. Keep the photos all together - along with special cards, ticket stubs, mementos, and anything else that makes you feel good about being a mom - in a shoe box. (Of course, you must get those new shoes you love in order to do this correctly.) Every year, look through your Goddess Mom box and see how much your kids have grown. - goddess mom, i like that! must buy shoes, more shoes then! for the boxes of course!
16. Give your kids quiet time every day. Let them learn to be by themselves with books, crayons, or blocks. - exactly!
17. Let your whole family take a day off and hang out in pj's all day long. - we call that weekends
18. Rent Sex and the City on DVD, and reminisce about the days when you were single and the biggest problem you had was whether the "He" of the moment was going to call. Let the romance of your youth seduce you. Then remember that, despite your freedom, all you really wanted was to fall in love and have beautiful babies. -amen!
19. Pitch a tent in the backyard. Use it as your outdoor reading room. Or when there's a full moon, plan a family campout with sleeping bags, a transistor radio, and s'mores, of course.
20. Invent a house fairy. Give her a name, and tell your kids that she is always watching them and counting up their good deeds.
21. Listen for the deep, happy sighs that come after your kids play or laugh really hard. Tuck them away in your heart. - i wish my heart's big enough to keep all the sighs and love moments i have with my kids. never a day goes by without something new to tuck in my heart.
i may be this steady mom to some friends who looks like parenting is a breeze, but if not for parenting.com and babycenter. i would be frazzled, wallowing in 2 post partum depressions and haggard looking 26 year old.
this is to all the moms and dads out there! Parenting Rocks!
21 ways to enjoy being a mom
1. When you're tired, hand your kids a brush, point to your head, and tell them to play beauty parlor. When you're really tired, pretend that you're Sleeping Beauty. - amen!
2. Take your mother to a spa. While you're both getting seaweed wraps, tell her all your favorite memories of growing up. - i think this would be impossible. haha!
3. Take a bath with your infant. Make sure your husband is around for the handoff, so you can relax until the last minute. (Don't forget to smell your baby right afterward. Heaven!) - exactly!
4. At the end of every summer, take a family photo for the holiday card (you'll be happy to have this accomplished once December comes). Every year, add a framed 11-by-14-inch print to your front hall. Your kids will be proud now and laugh later at the funny styles. - this is in the family pipeline (that sounds very sales-like! haha)
5. On St. Patrick's Day, dye the milk and eggs green and turn the furniture upside down so your home looks like total chaos. When your little ones wake up, tell them that the leprechauns came.
6. The next time you have to go to a boring kiddie activity, invite another mom-friend along. Hide wine in sippy cups for the two of you to nurse undercover. -haha nice idea!
7. Play Freaky Friday with your husband and switch roles for a day. Enjoy his renewed appreciation for his Super Mom wife. - i know!!
8. . In the dead of winter, fix some snacks, get under warm quilts, and watch Happy Feet on DVD. Tell your kids you love them even more than the penguins love their chicks. - no winter here in the Philippines but this is a great idea!
9. Go to the beach in the off-season. Throw rocks in the water and collect shells. Put them in a vase and use it as shelf decor in your living room.
10. Skip the Raffi and Barney. Turn your kids on to Bob Marley, They Might Be Giants, and Gwen Stefani. - hey, where's the beatles, the who, incubus etc?
11. Take your baby out to the movies at night. (Infants love the dark, and loud trailers make them snooze immediately.) Then you can sip your soda and munch your popcorn in peace. - is this true?
12. Buy yourself that fancy watch, strand of pearls, or whatever piece of expensive jewelry you've been lusting after. Justify your purchase by rationalizing that you'll pass it down to your daughter (or son's wife) eventually. -haha! i'll leave this to hubby. books for me. :)
13. Take your kids to live music performances from very early ages. Cheap ones outdoors are great to start with in case you need to make a hasty exit (like when a diaper explodes).
14. Use your kids as an excuse to do the things you want to do, like going to silly feel-good movies, eating mac and cheese for dinner, and jumping in the moonbounce. Use your kids as an excuse to get out of things you don't want to do, like going to a wedding or office party. - oh yes!
15. Every Mother's Day, have a picture taken with your kids. Keep the photos all together - along with special cards, ticket stubs, mementos, and anything else that makes you feel good about being a mom - in a shoe box. (Of course, you must get those new shoes you love in order to do this correctly.) Every year, look through your Goddess Mom box and see how much your kids have grown. - goddess mom, i like that! must buy shoes, more shoes then! for the boxes of course!
16. Give your kids quiet time every day. Let them learn to be by themselves with books, crayons, or blocks. - exactly!
17. Let your whole family take a day off and hang out in pj's all day long. - we call that weekends
18. Rent Sex and the City on DVD, and reminisce about the days when you were single and the biggest problem you had was whether the "He" of the moment was going to call. Let the romance of your youth seduce you. Then remember that, despite your freedom, all you really wanted was to fall in love and have beautiful babies. -amen!
19. Pitch a tent in the backyard. Use it as your outdoor reading room. Or when there's a full moon, plan a family campout with sleeping bags, a transistor radio, and s'mores, of course.
20. Invent a house fairy. Give her a name, and tell your kids that she is always watching them and counting up their good deeds.
21. Listen for the deep, happy sighs that come after your kids play or laugh really hard. Tuck them away in your heart. - i wish my heart's big enough to keep all the sighs and love moments i have with my kids. never a day goes by without something new to tuck in my heart.
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